.

everything or nothing.

what are all those thoughts?
when and why?
i cant even put into words, any of this...
you knew i was trying to say this all along.
you knew i screwed it up from the start.
i tried many times to say i won't be perfect for you.
i can't be the best..
i won't be able to give everything.
but i don't want to give you nothing.
you know this...
i don't want to see you putting on bracelets.
i'm not picking up the metal.
and i will fight you on this...
why don't i think i can help her? or you?
i could try answer that.
but how do you want me to answer that?
answer with words you only want to hear..
i don't know.
i don't believe that will help..
i am simply not convinced that i will always always always be here for you.
as much as i care for you and love you. cos i do.
you know i can't say the right things all the time or be there all the time.
who can? what do you want from me?
there's too many thoughts. too many things...

i am not saying goodbye.