.

So exhausted, but not a regular exhaustion.
an exhaustion from countless tears, literally countless.
again. yet again. an unbearable break down.
indescribable pain.
at times like this people would want someone to talk to or relate,
but i wouldnt want anyone to understand this pain.
to think someone else has probably encountered this like me, probably worse too..
memories, images, people, songs, things flashing through my head.
wasnt just every screw up, was about the plain things im not doing, not choosing.
deep breaths.
it went forever, so long i couldnt stop, i tried, i tried to fight myself, although i havent found any bruises...
i remember when, i was sure where hope was.
now im not and i cant explain it to a soul.
yet again.. its a new year soon and i dont see a thing.
what is this being?